My Computer Crashed

I was about to finish my database when suddenly my computer crashed. Whew... I have been working on my database for weeks now and all my efforts went to naught.

Unanswered Prayer...

Two days after I got a "your wish is granted" comment from my parish priest, here I am too lonely to hear the "declined remarks" to join the Japanese Scholarship from my superiors. I felt so low. I thought I was a little form surrounded by the head and foot of a parenthesis.

Prophecy

My lofty ambition was really intensified by the remarks I've got from the following: 1)a friend from Caloocan, told me that he could still foresee another scholarship for me; 2) my daughter Helena always include me on her prayers and have been seeing how many toys she could have once I'm there; and then my parish priest told me two days ago that my wish will be granted (I requested for the scholarship). None of these happened, err... maybe in the future, who knows?

Conflict

I prepared for this chance to compete with the best in the bureaucracy and it's a gauge on how far I could go. But I was literally shot before I could start.

Strange Feeling

Perhaps the happiest person now should she receive this information would be my wife. She really dislikes me to leave.

Home Anew!

I went to my hometown yesterday, in haste, to see once again the festive celebration at Barcenaga, Oriental Mindoro. I immediately ordered my wife and kids to go to the JAM bus station for a long drive to Batangas Pier. We missed the 12:00 midnight Ro-Ro ride though due to slow driving mode of the bus driver, instead we catched the 2:00 a.m. ride. Every one felt haggard and wasted because of the long trip.

It's been a long time since I last set foot at our island. I couldn't barely notice the young people I confronted with. The youngsters were very tall I supposed. I came here for two reasons: first, to attend our town fiesta and second, to seek for spiritual blessing from my parish priest regarding my quest for scholarship. I been a fan of spiritual blessing since I got it from a priest at Baybay, Leyte. There was an international conference that time and I was about to take the examination for teachers. The blessing was very effective since I passed the examination now I'm hoping that this request would still be an effective one. I hope that my superiors would let me join and compete in the Japanese scholarship.

As usual, the fiesta celebration had been attended by various people from different places and the extravagant and lavish food were visible all over households. When I was younger I remembered that during fiestas there where shed of blood that arised because of drunkness, well this one is not different. It just came to my knowledge that series of fights happened near our place and one of the victims was at ICU.

Speaking of my visit, I ate several sets of food prepared by my sisters and enjoyed my experienced here. My ageing mother is still on her good mood and what touched me most was when I overheard her saying, "I am happy because everyone comes but what would make me sad is when all of you leave." Whew...

I played chess with my colleagues from the Calapan Chess Club and visited "peryahan" and "tianggehan".

I offered a mass (8:00 a.m.) delivered by the provincial bishop. I have been searching for him for guidance but instead saw my town priest.

Tomorrow we would leave for Manila after enjoying two-day stay.

Family Prayer

I was really stunned to hear the prayer request of my daughter Helena yesterday. Know what? She petitioned for the approval of my scholarship to Japan, new house, etc. For her age I really couldn't believe she would say that.

Words of Encouragement

I received a text from someone regarding my application for scholarship in Japan. Her help was kind of moving me to another level. Imagine, I don't even know her yet she gave me some tips and encouragement.

Though I knew my success is no longer in my hands am so happy to receive such gesture.


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For the past weeks I have been working on my office database but wasn't able to finish it due to Ondoy and Pepeng's wrath. Classes were canceled and suspended most of the time.

Grand Prix Executive Chess

I participated in the 2009 Grand Prix Executive Chess at the Department of Agrarian Reform for the month of October and sad to note that I was totally outclassed by my opponents. It seemed that my line for King's Indian (Saemich Variation) was outdated as I was beaten blue on the opening stage of my Game 1. Game 2 was a drawn game but I pushed harder to win then ended up losing. I won both Games 3 & 4 and I was so happy to show the real me by providing by-the-book moves. Unfortunately, Game 5 was so frustrating. I used Caro Kann but my opponent knew this variation better. I ended up going home empty-handed but full of lessons learned due to experience.

I Will Persist Until I Succeed (by Og Mandino)

I was not delivered unto this World in defeat, nor does failure course in my veins. I will hear not those who weep and complain, for their disease is contagious. The slaughterhouse of failure is not my destiny.

The prizes of life are at the end of each journey, not near the beginning; and it is not given to me to know how many steps are necessary in order to reach my goal. Failure I may still encounter at the thousandth step, yet success hides behind the next bend in the road. Never will I know how close it lies unless I turn the corner.

I will be likened to the rain drop which washes away the mountain, the ant who devours a tiger, the star which brightens the earth, the slave who builds a pyramid. I will build my castle one brick at a time for I know that small attempts, repeated, will complete any undertaking. I will persist until I succeed.

I will never consider defeat and I will remove from my vocabulary such words and phrases as quit, cannot, unable, impossible, out of the question, improbable, failure, unworkable, hopeless, and retreat. I will avoid despair but if this disease of the mind should infect me then I will work on in despair. I will toil and I will endure.

I will remember, the ancient law of averages and I will bend it to my good. Each frown I meet only prepares me for the smile to come. Each misfortune I encounter I will carry in it the seed of tomorrow's good luck. I must have the night to appreciate the day. I must fail often to succeed only once. I will persist until I succeed.

Never will I allow any day to end with a failure. Thus I will plant the seed of tomorrow's success and gain an insurmountable advance over those who cease their labor at a prescribed time. When others cease their struggle, then mine will begin, and my harvest will be full.

Nor will I allow yesterday's success to lull me into today's complacency, for this is the greatest foundation of failure. I will forget the happenings of the day that is gone, whether they were good or bad, and greet the new sun with confidence that this will be the best day of my life.

So long as there is breath in me, that long will I persist. For I know one of the principles of success - if I persist long enough I will win.

I will persist! I will win!

Wishful Thinking...

Barely three days to go and my application for JICE scholarship will be forfeited. I have been waiting, longing, and praying that my request for a nomination from my Director be granted. Time was against me. Two weeks were wasted by typhoons Ondoy and Pepeng now I have nothing to blame but my self. How I wished I prepared my papers long time ago. How I wish I talked to my superiors before. How...

Letter to a Friend

I have been consistently writing a letter to my friend for almost 4 years now and I haven't got a response. It seems that I was forgotten. Yesterday I sent her my last mail.