Battered and Blue

Surprisingly, this feeling of emptiness due to financial dilemma is again bothering me.  I felt that I have a noxious personality that I always feel awful after spending time with myself.  My belief that I will be welcome to my family is clearly, non sequitur, on my part.  Everything had a strong pecuniary slant.  I am a fool causing things to misdirection.  Really, there is something quixotic in me about money.